an update

Jen 1619

I’m madly in love with this coffee. I picked it up at Trader Joe’s last week, as I am becoming more and more excited about the festive season approaching. And I fell in love at first sip. It tastes very Christmasy and I’m forcing myself to drink our OTHER (bor-ingggg) coffee in between the mornings when I have this Gingerbread coffee so that my mouth doesn’t become too adjusted to the delicious holiday flavors too soon.

Plus! Look at the little gingerbread man on the label. Adorable.

Jen 1618

I’ve been waking up in the middle of the night to find one of these two pillow hogs in between us in bed. Mostly the red one. He is SUCH a daddy’s cat, if I may invent the phrase. He is smitten with his father, is blue until Kevin comes home every day, and would really rather I never touched him. But when his dad picks him up, forget it. He’s puddy. And he hogs my pillow.

Jen 1621

My dear friend Meg gave me this amazing present for my birthday. A Fanny & Jane apron! She made it herself! It was the sweetest, most thoughtful gift. And she even made a little mistake on the first one she tried to make, so she brought that one along to give to Faryn! So sweet.

Kevin tried to snap a few shots of me wearing it yesterday morning, but we couldn’t get the lighting right so that you could see the logo well.

Jen 1612

Jen 1614

…and then I became a little exasperated with the process.

Jen 1615

I have to run out the door to an appointment, but I wanted to pop on and say hello.

My days have been filled with lots of busy and sometimes lots of not-so-busy, but the time still passes and I use it up in all kinds of ways. I’m enjoying the baking and the business right now. Fanny & Jane is doing well so far this holiday season, but I hope that we’ll be doing much better as Thanksgiving and Christmas approach. I’ve had a few moments of worry and stress that this business is never going to get off the ground in the ways I really hope it can. I realize that might sound a little pessimistic, but I’d be lying if I didn’t tell you that I feel unsure sometimes. In those moments, I tell myself that many people before us and many people after us have and will continue to build successful small businesses. I tell myself that if they can do it, we can do it. But sometimes, in a loud sea of fancy brands and options for consumers to choose from, it can feel overwhelming to try to carve out a little corner for yourself.

I also hope to set aside a bit more time to work on OTHER stuff soon. I haven’t been doing as much writing as I want to be doing, nor have I been focused on much besides baking, running this little company, and trying to get some exercise into my life every day. I suppose that’s good enough for now.

Anyway, you get the idea. I’ve always been 100% honest with all of you about where I am in this process. And although I’m still adoring having my time to myself and although I feel free and grateful to be so free, I still have concerns, worries and I’m still unsure about how it will all turn out.

At least I’m not showing up to that office every day anymore. I definitely feel as though I’ve made a huge step forward in my life, even if I’m not sure what the next few steps should be.

And I feel 29. The reality of that number has hit me a few times in the last few days. Realizing that my twenties are almost over. It’s pretty cool, actually. And I have more gray hair than every before.

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3 thoughts on “an update

  1. As someone who has been self employed for 6 plus years I can tell you I go in and out of feeling the way you feel now. There are times I worry about how my business will do and there are times I feel frustrated trying to fit in everything I want to. Here are a few things I’ve learned:

    1. When you feel like there is more than enough business to go around (versus feeling like the market is already full of what you are doing) it really changes things in my opinion.

    People will always want to buy sweet treats – if you feel like the opportunities for finding the people you want to reach are endless, you are free to be creative to think about how. (I have moments of worry about if I will continue to have enough buisiness but find telling myself “There are more than enough violin students for us all to teach” really puts me in creative mode vs. worry mode – but it is an ongoing reminder I have to give to myself).

    2. There are busy and down times in most businesses. It is during the busy time where I save a little and go with the flow and during the slow times where I relax and do creative things (like writitng) to my hearts content and don’t feel guilty about it one bit, because I know it will all get busy again soon and I’ve planned and budgeted to be able to do that.

    This may or may not help, but I love talking about the subject, so hopefully it’s at least interesting to hear about others working through the same issues 🙂

  2. As much as I love these holiday coffee flavors I need to stick to the cheap (borriiingg stuff) in the meantime. To add a little kick to the cheap stuff I sometimes add cinnamon powder, which reminds me of the holidays. If I’m feeling a chocolate craving kick in I add in some cocoa powder and voila!…mocha coffee.

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