on the yoga challenge

Today’s the first day I don’t want to go to yoga class.

I woke up late today – uuuggggh. I didn’t fall asleep until around 4am, after having watched TV, had a snack, done some computer stuff and read my book for a long time once I got home from the Harvard Sailing Team show. (Great show! Supah fun time.)

So when you don’t fall asleep until 4am, and when you usually don’t fall asleep until 4am, your body will sleep it’s full 7-8 hours.

Uuggggh. I’ve had to start letting go, finally, of being frustrated about when I wake up. I thought it would turn into this and it has. Acceptance. It’s time to accept it. But today I woke up late, even for me. And it left me feeling grumpy.

I googled “headache when you wake up,” because I had one. Seratonin levels, it said. Sure. Makes sense. I think I also grind my teeth.

I don’t wanna go to yoga class tonight. But I will. That’s the commitment I’ve made to myself, and to finding out what it will be like to push through it even on the days I don’t wanna go. I’m sure it will be good for me to get out of the house, cheer up, do something that always brings me joy, something I never regret once it’s over. Every other day before now, however, I’ve wanted to go, been excited to.

Eh, just talking about it now is making me look more forward to going, truthfully. I’m growing addicted.

I have completed seven days of the challenge and I can definitely tell a difference. My body feels thinner, leaner, and I feel strong. Also, as I’ve said, I’m sore. Not REALLY sore, but I’m sore, you know? My upper back hurts. And I am constantly cracking and creaking and popping and feeling joints realign themselves or something. I don’t know. I notice my body, that’s for sure.

I’m loving the act of coming to the mat every day. It’s certainly a spiritual experience and I love to practice being still. It’s HARD as hell, being still in mind and body, and frankly, I’m not great at it. I don’t say that as a judgment, just as an observation. But I’m working on it. And the effort is a valiant one.

Okay, I’m definitely looking forward to going now. 🙂

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2 thoughts on “on the yoga challenge

  1. Nothing is ever enough for so many of us… if you wake up at 11, then you tell yourself that you should have gotten up at 10. It’s so hard to accept that we’re just listening to our bodies and there’s no need to get guilt involved. I completely understand what you’re saying b/c I do the same thing.

    I love your yoga challenge… it’s inspiring me to get to class, even when I don’t feel like it or have excuses!

    • Thanks for saying that, Laura. That made me feel better to know I’m not the only person who goes through this. And I suppose you’re exactly right – it’s just like with anything else that I refuse to give myself a hard time over. Why can’t waking up at 11 (if I went to sleep at 5am) be good enough?

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